In a mirror, dimly

I released the latest version of Chronicle Lite this weekend. So, that’s out of my hair in time to enjoy a vacation over the 4th of July. That said I am looking around for something to code … since that application has consumed my attentions for a while now. It’s my open-source obsession and I love it. Wouldnt give it up for the world. If someone were to offer to pay me to develop it commercially, I’d accept in a heartbeat. Still, I want some time away from the code, time for the new release to filter out to the masses, time for user feedback and experiences to develop. I want the user-base at large to gain enough familiarity with the application that they give a priority list of new features that they would like to see added.

Part of me wants to return to the server-side cousin of Chronicle Lite (jBlog) and it’s motley family of related server side projects. They’ve languished in the “Im still thinking about it” bucket of design. Putting some DAOs and basic code together for them would feel good. The down-side is that I am still locked into the world of blog software and my brain would like a short break from it.

So, whats left? What projects have been incubating on the hard-drive and wanting out? Well, there’s another one that falls into the category of “If they offered to pay me, I’d quit and commercialize it” camp. The associated domain is out there and wanting me to register it too. Im thinking I might just grab the domain and host design documents on the site, along with a project timeline. Thats all I need though: another software obsession!

I hate stress - I feel the twinge of panic, of a emotional reggedness, prowling around the edge of my psyche. The heat was turned up and I am starting to go crispy around the edges. Over the last couple of quarters I’ve watched the rest of my VLI class slowly fragment with the second year students cranking up into gear to graduate and move off into ministry whereever and the only other first year student getting horribly busy with planned mission trips, kids camp and job responsibilities. The evening classes were getting more and more fragmented - we decided to break at the 1/2 way point of the class during dark cold months “until the weather improves” only to sick with breaking at 1/2 way once the evenings got light again.

Im whining. I know.

What I want is the close class of peers again. I miss them, miss the human contact and the sense of attacking difficult material as a group together, sharing in the successes and pains of one another as we progress through the course. Right now I’m floating in limbo - the summer quarter, not quite a second year and certainly not a first year student - with only one other person for classes through the summer.

Roll on fall is all I can say. I’ve been praying and have raised the urgency of the prayer a few notches of late … praying for at least 6 people to start the course in the fall (2 from each of the 3 established Vineyards in town). I know what I want, whether that’s what God wants is another thing entirely!

Non illigitamus carborundum

Right now I need to thank Finding Nemo for finding the words for me:

Crush: Yeah, we saw you and we were like “whoa”, and you were like “whoa…” and we went like, “whoa…”

I just had a call offering me my first real preaching opportunity - 4th Sunday of the month one of the local nursing homes needs someone for their afternoon service. I was offered a spot this Sunday (unfortunately, our church has a baptismal service in the early afternoon that I want to attend) or next month. VLI preaching/teaching training comes into play and the rubber hits the road July 25th.

Life is really rather complicated right now - too much happening too quickly. Work wants to break out of its box and is threatening to swamp all of the rest of life and I cant let that happen. There was, for the last three semesters, a quiet truce between work and VLI training, an implicit support from my immediate manager over doing the course. Now I am faced with a task list conservatively estimated at 16 man days, with 10 real working days to get it done, and I’m wondering where the support went. Seems an edict came down from on high and here we all are. So now, what happens? Seems to me that I need to enforce the boundries again, force work back into its box, but that is clearly a “career limiting move” with the present management hierarchy. So, once again, life and motivation and decision making comes down to the age-old simple maxim I’ve lived by in circumstances like these before

Non illigitamus carborundum

I’ll leave you to look up the meaning…